Lost, but Never Forgotten: On Umbrellas and Mirrors

Recently, I had the honor of sitting with the family of a woman, lost to a tragic act of horror only a short few years ago.

In my small studio space, I crowded four women around my reading table: the sister of this woman lost, her mother, and her two aunts. I love what I do in my role as a medium, and though I treat each interaction between Living & Dead as a sacred act, this experience was especially touching. I’ll never forget it.

During this reading, this woman gone too soon, this sister/daughter/niece came through, as well as the Mom of the three women. There was so much Spirit in these spirits! They were peppy, full of life, even on the Other Side. I always remind folks that when our loved ones and ancestors come through during a reading, they do so as the person they were when they were here. While our souls continue to evolve, even in Death, we’re still the same person, with the same personality, as we were when we were in Life.

It was almost a full 90-minutes of bouncing around to Mom, to Aunt, to Sister, back to the other Aunt, with healing guidance from both the Grandmother and young woman taken too soon. One Aunt was told she should stop eating popcorn, and she indeed was a fan of popcorn, buying it a couple times a week from a convenience store. The other Aunt was encouraged to begin the journey of continuing her education, even though she was about to retire. This young woman who passed too soon came through to tell her Mom that she loved what she was doing in terms of volunteering - and come to find out, the Mom was volunteering, visiting her granddaughter’s class to help out. “Nana is coming! Nana is coming!” the Mom said with a big smile on her face, full of love. This Mom had become Nana to each of the students in the class and her Spirits loved the love she was giving to the children in her life, even if they weren’t blood relatives.

I love all the sessions I give, yet I especially love the sessions where I learn something I’d never known before. As this Spirit was coming through to her family, she was talking to her sister for part of the session. She was encouraging her sister to get some exercise, and most especially to go ice skating, something they shared when they were younger. The best kind of exercise is the kind we can enjoy without actually feeling like we’re exercising, and ice skating was just that to this woman.

And yet, the most interesting part of this session was when the Spirit of this sister started talking to her living sister about her lotion. Yes, lotion, specifically body lotion. This Spirit told me to tell her sister that she should continue rubbing her body down with lotion, that it was an act of protection. Come to find out, she was indeed rubbing her body down from head to toe, daily, with lotion. Her mom and her aunts laughed, as they recently all went on a trip together and she was encouraging everyone to rub themselves down with lotion, just like she did.

In my head, where all my communications take place, I asked this sister how could the act of rubbing her body down with lotion be an act of protection, of shielding? The sister came through and told me it was in her lotion itself. That the living sister was using a lotion that used actual natural plants, not chemicals or synthetics, and it was in this act, this act of using plant medicine that helped to protect her.

I am an animist. This means that I truly believe that every rock, tree, lake, river, mountain all has a spirit of its own. We may or may not be able to communicate with them, but they have a spirit very much their own. And plant spirits all have a major plant spirit. That means there’s essentially one Birch spirit, found in all the birch trees around the planet. There’s one Rosemary spirit, found in all the rosemary around the planet. It applies to every plant on the planet.

And somehow, this sister on the other side was appealing to the spirits of the plants found inside this lotion to protect her sister. I’d never seen nor heard of anything like this, but the sister was adamant that she continue her daily ritual with these lotions and oils. That the act of doing so was an act of protection. Protection from what? I would venture to say negative energies and emotions from others, perhaps even predatory spirits.

There were anecdotes and funny stories shared, suggestions and guidance, from the Other Side. It was an incredible session. I will always honor the role I play here, while I’m here, on this broken, beautiful Earth. We are all in need of cultivating a more active role with Spirit, every single one of us. Part of what I do as a medium is to demonstrate to people that the Unseen World does indeed overlap and interact with the Seen World, every day, and in ways we can’t really understand as humans.

What I’ve discovered in my time as a medium is that we all have “Umbrella Spirits.” I’ve never had a mentor, I’ve never taken a class, and yet what I’ve discovered is that every single one of us - unless we’re a truly evil, wicked person and they’ve abandoned us - have an Umbrella, if not multiple Umbrellas. They’re umbrellas to us as I see them as rays of light, different colored, over our heads. Just like an umbrella, they want to keep pain and misfortune from befalling us.

And just like living people, deceased people have different strengths. I’ve always wondered why misfortune and pain befall some of us more than others, and I truly believe it’s because some spirits, some Umbrellas, are stronger than others. Some Umbrellas can keep hail from pelting us on the head, but would never stop a meteor or meteorite from falling through and striking us.

These Umbrellas act very much in the macro, meaning they’re over our family as a collective, and yet they’re over our head in the micro, as individuals. And when one individual in life needs healing and guidance more than others, these Umbrella Spirits funnel down and offer what healing and guiding energy they can. I’ve felt these spirits hone right in on specific physical ailments and tell me they’re combatting whatever is going on there. 

This is why that niece, from the Other Side, told her Aunt she should stop eating popcorn. It was doing something of damage to her insides.

These Umbrellas, these ancestors and loved ones see us as if from behind a one-way mirror. You know those one-way mirrors that you see in detective movies or cop shows, where the suspects are on the side where they can’t see the detectives or police? That’s very much like what separates Us from Them. They can see through this mirror, they can sense us, see us, feel us, yet we don’t have the same ability to interact, generally speaking. This is why They are very frustrated where they’re at. They can see what’s causing ailments and pains and they do whatever they can to send signals and signs for us to stop, yet most of us don’t have the ability or willingness to listen.

I am really fascinated by this idea of Umbrellas. During this reading, this sister/daughter/niece was very much an Umbrella, just like the mother and grandmother of these four women were. And it was shown to me during this reading, almost like a pyramid where they both sat at the tops, that the Grandmother was watching out for the grown women, her daughters, and this sister, this young woman who passed way too soon, was watching out for the children she left behind, as well as her nieces and nephews. But they were both watching over the entire family, yet it was like they were dividing up duties of protection.

During this reading, this sister shared guidance and information for her living sister’s husband. When we have an Umbrella that loves us, and we love someone else, that person we love falls under the cover of that Umbrella - even if that Umbrella didn’t like or love them in life. Once they get to the Other Side, they know that there’s nothing more important than Love, and if we truly love someone, all of those petty concerns they may have had in life fall away. That’s why this woman was offering up guidance for her brother-in-law, and how he could make improvements in his life to lead a better life.

And these Umbrellas are always with us, even if we don’t feel them and even if they don’t show themselves immediately during a reading. I’ve found that Mothers and Grandmothers are more often the Umbrellas of a family, and that’s not to say that Fathers and Grandfathers aren’t necessarily Umbrellas as well. It might be that the women communicate with me more often, but I don’t think that’s it. I’ve found that men just seem to get to the Other Side and do what they want, where the women watch out more for their families, generally speaking.

Here’s an example: I had a reading with a woman in her Eighties, who lost her husband of 55 years. During the reading, the husband came through, showing his wife that he was 1) fishing, and 2) enjoying barbecue. I could literally smell the barbecue in the air. The third part was very difficult for me to share as it made me very uncomfortable, but I had to share it. This husband wanted me to tell his wife he was enjoying his Playboy magazines. Imagine how difficult it was for me to tell his 80-something-year-old woman that her husband was fishing, barbecuing, and enjoying Playboy on the Other Side! When I told her, she said very matter-of-factly:

“Why was that difficult? That makes me happy. Those were his three favorite things!”

I had to laugh. Come on, that was funny.

I had another reading with a woman where her grandmother came through very strongly, offering her all the guidance and clarity she needed for the difficulties she was confronting in life at that moment. At the end of the reading, she asked me a question:

“Please remind me - just because they don’t come through here doesn’t mean they’re not with me, right?” And I reminded her that was true, and she told me that she was really hoping to hear from her Dad, who she was very close to.

And as soon as she said that, he was in my head, immediately. Weirdly enough, he was in California at the time of the reading, enjoying the coast of northern California where the redwood forests met the ocean. It was a place he very much enjoyed in life. Then, he put a John Denver song in my head, a song that very much confirmed to his daughter that he was there, always a part of her. He was just enjoying his time on the Other Side. Then he gave me a very good analogy as to how he was operating on her behalf.

Some Umbrellas are very much like anti-virus software on a computer. Think of your life as a computer, one with many moving pieces. Imagine having an anti-virus software program on your computer. If your computer is running smoothly, with no issues, then this anti-virus program just sits there and doesn’t do much. Yet, if a problem comes into this computer (or your life) then this anti-virus program, or this Umbrella Spirit like this woman’s father, would “activate” - the program, this father, would be there immediately, doing their best to quarantine and combat whatever issue crept in.

This is a reminder to us all - from this group of four women to the woman who lost her husband of 55 years, to this daughter who lost her beloved father - that we should do our best to carry on in a healthy and peaceful way, not only for us but for those we love on the other side of that Great Mirror. If we have loved ones on the other side, trust me when I say: when we hurt, they look through that mirror, see us and feel us, and they hurt.

It’s my opinion the best kind of child is the kind of child who can grow up to be self-sufficient. Not necessarily rich or successful, but one who doesn’t have to borrow money from their parents all the time, who doesn’t need to be bailed out of jail - a child that allows their parents to lead a second life, if you will. The best kind of survivors, the best kind of people who grieve, are people who can come to some semblance of peace in their lives. Just like a self-sufficient child, if you come to a place of stability, lacking stress or worries for the most part, you allow your loved ones on the other side to enjoy. If you’re full of strife and worry, drama and stress, your loved ones can’t enjoy the Other Side - they’ll be hovering around you, funneling their loving, healing energy to you.

We not only owe it to ourselves to find a place of peace, we owe it to those we love on the Other Side. In the case of these four women who visited me to speak to their sister/daughter/niece, they were all doing what they could to live in a place of peace, even after suffering from the worst kind of loss we can experience: when one of our loved ones are ripped from this world too soon. And by living in a place of peace, they were allowing her to do what she could from the Other Side of the Great Mirror and watch over the kids in their family, the ones who truly need protection and guidance.

Remember those Umbrellas around us, and honor them by taking care of yourself, as best you can. Remember that Great Mirror through which they watch us, and know that if you’re hurting, they’re hurting.

Love yourself, and care for yourself, as they would both love and care for you.

That’s all they want for us.